Express Empathy
- Listen to your sons statements
- Go within & Check, “How would I be feeling if were him?”
- Express your understanding through an empathy statement of
“You feel______________because _________________
It sounds like you feel…
I sense you feel…
As I listen to you, I am aware of how ___________you must be feeling.
In other words, you feel…
I am imagining how intensely you must feel…
Summarize His Experience
This whole situation can then be summed up to…
You seem to be saying most of the time you feel…
You recall this happening at least three times then.
These are the options you currently see open to you…
Paraphrase His Meaning
You don’t think he’s very competent…
You feel your parents would be upset if…
You wonder what will happen in the future
So it’s a question of clarifying your role in your relationship
Prompt Him to Say More
Non-verbal prompts:
Nods, Hand gestures, eye contact, leaning in
Single Words or Phrases:
Never?
And then?
And for your part?
Statements:
I am not sure what you mean by “the worst”
It’s not clear to me which option you prefer.
I am unable to get a clear idea of the importance of this to you.
Use Open Ended Questions
How does this impact your school work?
How have you handled situations like this before?
In what other situations have you experienced similar feelings?
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