How to Change your brain

This time of year, many of us are wondering how to change bad habits.  Others plan out ways to accomplish big goals for the year.  We may take big ideas and break them down into small steps or we may subscribe to a “Guru’s” fool proof way to “rock out 2019”. I recently read a book that argued … Continue reading How to Change your brain

How Porn Addiction Hurts

I was watching my son’s baseball game the other day and happened to overhear an exchange between two parents and their two sons that compelled me to write this post. The two boys were joking and laughing with one another through out the game. One of the boys joked with his mother sitting near by … Continue reading How Porn Addiction Hurts

Marriage Conversations for Connection

My last post regarding couples counseling discussed the three demon dialogues described by Susan Johnson in her book Created for Connection. The three patterns of conflict most common in couples counseling are called find the bad guy, the protest polka, and freeze and flee. Each dialogue is a unique pattern of couple interaction driven by … Continue reading Marriage Conversations for Connection

Marriage Counseling

We provide couples therapy in Quincy, IL for couples that have experienced disconnection, infidelity, conflict, or separation.  Couples therapy is one of the most important services I have the privilege of providing. Often time’s couples come to me not knowing exactly what went wrong in their relationship. Not only that, they struggle to figure out … Continue reading Marriage Counseling

Adolescent Boredom Busters

For many parents the worst phrase that could come out of their adolescent’s mouth is, “I’m Bored”. This phrase can push the parent fear buttons of “entitlement”, “laziness”, “ungratefulness” or “failure-to-launch”. These buttons when pushed tend to produce feelings of failure, inadequacy, and helplessness. The problem of Boredom Richard Winter described the problem of boredom … Continue reading Adolescent Boredom Busters

How to create a great marriage

How do you create a great marriage? At the end of couples counseling sessions I often ask, "what is one thing you could do to serve your spouse this week?"  If a great marriage is something that is created, I believe serving your spouse is the first act of creation. What are some ways we … Continue reading How to create a great marriage

5 Ways to Listen So Your Son Feels Heard

Express Empathy Listen to your sons statements Go within & Check, “How would I be feeling if were him?” Express your understanding through an empathy statement of “You feel______________because _________________ It sounds like you feel… I sense you feel… As I listen to you, I am aware of how ___________you must be feeling. In other … Continue reading 5 Ways to Listen So Your Son Feels Heard

The Three Biggest Challenges of Christian Fatherhood

I recently read a report on the “State of Biblical Fatherhood”. This report was based on a survey that Manhood Journey asked members of their online community to complete. The survey received responses from 274 fathers most of whom are Christians. Although this survey was not conducted as a scientific research endeavor it does offer … Continue reading The Three Biggest Challenges of Christian Fatherhood

5 Ways to Connect With Your Spouse

Connection with our children is crucial, however research also shows that the relationship between a child’s parents is also very important for childhood outcomes. Beyond that having a connection with your spouse just makes married life more enjoyable and rewarding. Here are five simple ways to connect with your spouse Plan a Date night: Be … Continue reading 5 Ways to Connect With Your Spouse

5 Ways to Connect With Your Son

Parenting is all about connecting with your children.  Sometimes we want to make it about obedience, education, success or love.  But, really all of those things follow from connection.  If you are connected to your son he will obey you.  Connection with your son increases his chance at success in school, relationships and work.  The … Continue reading 5 Ways to Connect With Your Son