The Connections Blog

How can I help my stressed child

I am often asked, How can I help my stressed child? We live in a culture full of stress. There is pressure to be involved, pressure to be the best, and pressure to fit in. Some claim that the current generation is exposed to more stress than any previous generation. Psychologists define stress as “the … Continue reading How can I help my stressed child

How to build your child’s self-esteem?

Self-esteem is a concept that is regularly discussed in our culture. Many parents fill their child’s life with activities, play dates, and positive affirmations in the hopes of creating greater confidence. In many cases however, it does not seem to work. The harder we work to build our kids up the lower their self-regard. This … Continue reading How to build your child’s self-esteem?

How Porn Addiction Hurts

I was watching my son’s baseball game the other day and happened to overhear an exchange between two parents and their two sons that compelled me to write this post. The two boys were joking and laughing with one another through out the game. One of the boys joked with his mother sitting near by … Continue reading How Porn Addiction Hurts

Service through Presence

I graduated with my PhD in Counselor Education and Supervision on May 12, 2018.  I was privileged to be the commencement speaker for Adams State University's graduate school ceremony.  Below is the text of my Address: Great Accomplishment Graduates!! Is this a great day or what?!! If you are like me, there were moments in … Continue reading Service through Presence

Dialectical Behavior Therapy

Dialectical Behavior Therapy is an evidence-based form of counseling that was developed for the treatment of borderline personality disorder (BPD). Marsha Linehan developed the model by combining the commonly used concepts of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) with mindfulness and meditation practices. Research has demonstrated that dialectical behavior therapy is an effective treatment for BPD and … Continue reading Dialectical Behavior Therapy

Forgiveness in Marriage

Sometimes in marriage counseling we encounter couples that overcome their demon dialogues, create a new dance of intimacy, and rewrite the story of their marriage. Yet, just when it appears they will move to a deeper level of connection one partner brings up a seminal incident that they just can’t seem to “let go”. Susan … Continue reading Forgiveness in Marriage

Marriage Conversations for Connection

My last post regarding couples counseling discussed the three demon dialogues described by Susan Johnson in her book Created for Connection. The three patterns of conflict most common in couples counseling are called find the bad guy, the protest polka, and freeze and flee. Each dialogue is a unique pattern of couple interaction driven by … Continue reading Marriage Conversations for Connection

Marriage Counseling, The Demon Dialogues

We provide Marriage counseling in Quincy, IL by leading couples through the process of recognizing and reshaping their relational dance.  In a previous post (linked here) I discussed this process as presented by Susan Johnson the developer of Emotion Focused Couples Therapy. Susan describes emotion as the music that drives the interaction (dance steps) of the … Continue reading Marriage Counseling, The Demon Dialogues

Helping Your Teen With Depression

What is Depression? The DSM-V defines depression as: “The presence of sad, empty, or irritable mood, accompanied by somatic, and cognitive changes that significantly affect the individual’s capacity to function” More specifically the DSM lists the criteria for a Major depressive episode as 5 or more of the following symptoms when they occur during the … Continue reading Helping Your Teen With Depression

Marriage Counseling

We provide couples therapy in Quincy, IL for couples that have experienced disconnection, infidelity, conflict, or separation.  Couples therapy is one of the most important services I have the privilege of providing. Often time’s couples come to me not knowing exactly what went wrong in their relationship. Not only that, they struggle to figure out … Continue reading Marriage Counseling